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Author Archives: The Pretend Triathlete
Serious Post about Training your Pelvic Floor
When I was in the Navy a fellow sailor once told me that he had never farted in front of a girl. This was because, he said in all earnestness, he had such good control of his butthole. Now I … Continue reading
Serious Post About Pooping Under a Bridge
When you gotta go you gotta go. I don’t always poop in a toilet, and you can bet when I don’t it gets very inconvenient. Continue reading
Posted in Health and Fitness, Running, Trail running, workout
2 Comments
Big Cycling News!
Good news, everyone! I know you’ve been waiting to hear this. I got the blu-ray player in the garage to connect to my wifi! And when I say I got it to connect I mean it just started working again. … Continue reading
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On the Bike Again
Wow, it has been a long time since I rode a bike. The last recorded instance of me pedaling a bicycle was June 30, 2017. The time before that was December 3rd, 2016. Now, I know what you’re saying. “You’re … Continue reading
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Opinions Are Like Doughnut Holes, Everybody Likes Them
I’m not sure I got that saying right, but as I was out running this morning I realized I had some opinions. And I very much like my opinions, so I guess in a way the title is correct; everybody … Continue reading
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MR340 (Missouri River, 340 Miles)
Well, it hasn’t been quite a year since I last posted, so not too bad. Let’s get up to date. In my last post I said I was going to do the Dogwood Canyon trail run, and then the Bass … Continue reading
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So You Can Post From Your Phone?
I’ve actually seen this option for a long time on the app, but who wants to type that many words with your thumbs? Anywho…I’m doing the Dogwood Canyon Trail Run in a couple of weeks. It’s 25K the first day … Continue reading
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Clinton Marathon (or Half) – 2016
Info about the Clinton, MO Marathon and Half Marathon Continue reading
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The Difference a Week Makes
The real reason for this post is to show you this: That’s me and my girls posing for my wife and their mom before the Father-Daughter Dance here in town. It’s funny, but the “silly” pose got the most response … Continue reading
Posted in 50k, Cycling, Health and Fitness, Running, Trail running, triathlon
Tagged 50k, creatine, father-daughter dance, triathlon
2 Comments
The Number One Reason to Stay Fit and Race
Being healthy enough to climb a flight of stairs without gasping like you just surmounted K2 sans oxygen is great, but I think we all know that the biggest payoff to being fit and using that fitness to complete races is … Continue reading
Pretend Triathlete 